See It For What It Is, Not What You Want it To Be


When it comes to relationships, I learned you can’t shape the person your with to who you want them to be. You must adapt and guide them as they are to guide you, both of you will compromise on the journey you both wanted to share with. Love is powerful and a strong word. If you are happy and love yourself before the relationship, when it ends they cannot take something from you that you already provide yourself and you can continue to be happy and love yourself after the relationship ends.

You do not have the power to change someone and vice versa. To love someone you must love them all the way down to what is the deal breaker. Including putting up with the bullshit by swallowing the pain. But oh wait, love is not painful so this should be a sign that you deserve something better something more.

But love is tricky because in our minds we believe that this is the best we can do. That nothing better will come along so we minds well settle for what is available in the moment. Most times we end up just loving the person for what they think they can do for us and they can never meet that expectation of filling our voids since we want to avoid facing them ourselves. I was in love once before I got married and now looking back I now know that I was only in the relationship to cover up any pain I had and lack of self love because this person was going through his own pain. Hurting each other was easier than leaving because all we knew was pain and disappointments. I thought this was normal and how real relationships were. But I had to See it for what it is, not what I wanted it to be.

I refused to settle for less than, but I also learned that I cannot put that much power in someone else to make me happy, feel better about myself, or even love myself. Just remember practicing self care will show you how to love yourself. Being selfish is okay. Taking time out everyday to do what makes you happy without your partner will show you that you can make yourself happy without someone else.

  • Walk through nature/park
  • Taking a long hot bath
  • Reading a Book
  • Taking up a hobby

What are some ways you do to have self love?

Control Your Seborrheic Dermatitis (Adult Cradle Cap) without Steriods

seborrheic dermatitis without steriods


I have numerous of posts about my skin and how I deal with SD, but my most recent searches have helped me understand why my skin is still reacting badly even with being consistent with my skin and hair care routine.

The best thing to do is avoid gluten, wheat, processed sugars, and dairy. I love cheese so for the next few months I’m going to be going through a lot of withdrawals. Processed sugars and gluten is another guilty pleasure. Who can eat spaghetti without garlic bread or a salad without croutons? Definitely not this girl.

control your seborrheic dermatitis

Lately I have been using a mixture of products for my skin. I’ve made my own Apple Cider Vinegar toner using water to dilute the vinegar and tea tree oil.  Right now my bathroom looks like an aisle from CVS with all the bottles and concoctions that I mixed myself. I alternate between shampoos, this helps my scalp and hair not get used to the ingredients plus I can use based on the hairstyle I want for that day. My shampoos have to have at least 2% Pyrithione Zinc as the main active ingredient. Anything less and I’m going to continue to see flakes or dry patches on my scalp. Tea Tree oil and Salicylic Acid are also great ingredients to have in your face wash or shampoo, but I noticed that it doesn’t do as great of a job like Pyrithione Zinc does for me on my scalp

My hair care is simple compare to my skin care. I treat my scalp with dandruff products like oils and shampoo, but when it comes to my skin it gets a little more complicated beings that I can’t always use the same products on my face that I use on my scalp. If my face is horrible I will use Giovanni or Aveeno on my face because of the anti-inflammatory and calming properties in the shampoo. But I also deal with acne and blackheads which shampoos can’t control either. Keeping the inside of your body healthy as the outside is key which I’ve learned the hard way with icy tea. (Damn you!)

oily, acne prone, seborrheic dermatitis

Right now I use Salicylic Acid on my face to combat both SD and acne. My favorite are drugstores because who has money to wash down the drain? That’s basically where your money is going when you purchase a face wash. Most people with SD deal with dry skin, but I’m the opposite. I have oily, acne prone, sensitive, seborrheic dermatitis skin. It’s a mouth full, but it helps when finding products that fit my skin. My skin gets uber greasy even during the winter times! When it comes to moisturizing I stick to the basics. I dulite my tea tree oil, oregano oil, neem oil with Cetaphil Moisturizer during the day. At night I just use the oils dulited with jojoba oil.

I also deal with hyper-pigmentation and as always my trusty Palmer’s Fade Cream for Oily Skin is perfect. I know people preach about sunscreen, but I personally don’t like them. They make my skin extra white and  they always irritate my skin. Neutrogena’s Clear Face Sunblock Lotion doesn’t do either and it doesn’t clog my pores, but I still hate the white mask it gives when I take pictures or sweat profusely when I’m outside.

The main tip I have is moisturize! The more you moisturize it will trick you face into thinking you already have enough oil so it will produce less oil on your face. I know crazy. Dry your skin out to combat the oils only to load it with more oil, but you be surprise how much less your face will break out when its hydrated! Same goes for oily skin if you don’t have SD.

What is your skin care routine? Let’s talk! :) 


Free Kindle eBooks ~ Goddess Edition

I love free anything and especially free books because I’m always reading especially while driving, waiting for an appointment, or just something on the stove. Audio books are a favorite during working out and cleaning.

Just share to view the items. :)


*FTC: Pictures may redirect you to amazon, but I will not be compensated if you purchase since they are FREE!*

FREE Travel Size & Full Size Secret Clinical Strength Deodorant

Free full and travel size secret deodorant

Get Free Secret Clinical Strength Travel Size and a coupon for a Free Full Size! *Just pay $2.99 for shipping

Healthy Home Toothpaste is Here!

healthy home company

The Healthy Home Company is excited to share with you our latest innovation in healthy living—Toothpaste! Made with organic, EcoCert and ToxicFree® ingredients, Toothpaste features antioxidant-rich Maqui berry and stabilized chlorine dioxide (stabilized oxygen) to whiten teeth naturally, while helping prevent gum disease and cavities. Free from harmful ingredients like fluoride, sulfate, silica, triclosan and titanium dioxide, Toothpaste is safe for the whole family. Some people may be surprise to know that having fluoride in your toothpaste is not necessary and consider a toxin if ingested. Flavored with refreshing peppermint and sweetened with xylitol (which is known for its low glycemic impact and preferred by dentists), Toothpaste will help give your family a brighter, whiter smile.

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BUY NOW! - This is a great deal if you purchase as a member! :)

What type of toothpaste do you and your family use?